I have been very sad since November last year. I didn't know if I should share this but I feel as I am in a safe place here I can share this with you my dear friends. James is my grandson. Here he is:-
These photos are from Nov 2012 the last time we had him at our home.
This is my beautiful ANGEL and I can't look at his photographs with out crying! I am BEREFT
This may sound strange because he is still ALIVE. But his mother has been with another man and had two children to him and has now moved house and never told us. We went round to pick him up as we have done for the last four years. I was there when he was born (I actually assisted). We have been an integral part of his life from his birth. It didn't work out between our son and her but still she allowed us to pick him up every fortnight. Anyway, time passes and a couple of boyfriends came and went. Then Ryan came on the scene she quickly became pregnant and then another pregnancy followed he was good with James and we had nothing to negative to say apart from he didn't want a relationship with us never spoke to us etc and we suspected that this day may come, put prayed it wouldn't. We have no legal rights we can enforce, our son can not get access as there is no legal aid now for him to claim.
So we haven't seen our beautiful boy since November 2012 the month of his birthday. I ache with longing for him. I think it's some times worse than him being dead, because he is out there somewhere and I can't do anything to find him. Then I think don't be stupid he is ALIVE and out there somewhere and that is better surely.
So here is a page for James Michael Anthony, My Grandson I love you so much be safe and god protect you my angel boy where ever you are love Grandma & Granddad your uncles Shawn & Matthew who also miss you loads and the rest of your family who miss you.
I found this poem for the loss of a child and this is how I feel:
The Cord
We
are connected,
My child and I, by
An invisible cord
Not seen by the eye.
It's not like the cord
That connects us 'til birth
This cord can't been seen
By any on Earth.
This cord does it's work
Right from the start.
It binds us together
Attached to my heart.
I know that it's there
Though no one can see
The invisible cord
From my child to me.
The strength of this cord
Is hard to describe.
It can't be destroyed
It can't be denied.
It's stronger than any cord
Man could create
It withstands the test
Can hold any weight.
And though you are gone,
Though you're not here with me,
The cord is still there
But no one can see.
It pulls at my heart
I am bruised...I am sore,
But this cord is my lifeline
As never before.
I am thankful that God
Connects us this way
A mother and child
Death can't take it away!
Author Unknown
We love you James. Your Uncles love & miss you as does all our family. We pray one day we will see you again that you will remember some of the times we have spent together, that we love & wanted to see you no matter what you are told by others. I pray you will be safe and protected and that one day we will see you again God bless you my dear boy Gxx